the EMerald city

Getting to know you, getting to know all about you.

That's what we are doing. It's been just a short while since we have been talking. . . part of which we were googled-eyed and dreamy. And while we do know each other, we don't really know and understand some avenues of our lives that are there. Thank you for not giving up on me. In a way, I am learning so much from you. Perhaps this (what things have come to) is the best way for us to have that chance to know each other without wearing our emerald-shaded glasses so-to-speak.

pretty in pink

I bought this dress about a month ago. A real "steal". Regularly $249 I snatched it up at a reasonable $30. Oh yah! I'm know, I'm good, but as most purchased sale items, I have no where to wear it yet, and I had to go out and buy a new pair of champagne strappy shoes and some cute accessories to well, to accessorize it, but all I can say is that I am ready should some event bestow itself upon me to need such a lovely dress. It is a gorgeous just-below-the-knee in length, light pink satin overlaid with light pink and gold lace, v-cut front with a small gather between the breasts, a rather altogether whimsical dress. The straps are made of ribbon and there is a double ribbon that ties around the waist. So cute. If I get a picture of myself in it I'll have to post it (*but be forewarned that I've been told that I look absolutely smashing in it).

Thinking there seems to be a lot of pink sinking into my wardrobe these days. Must be the inner woman in me coming out for an appearance. It's about time.

wedding planning

Ok, so I have this flat mate who is getting married in May. She's kinda getting stressed. I ask her, "Molly, what is wrong?" and she tells me "it's just that I have never done this before." and I assure her that that was a "good thing," *wink* and that since I had helped with a number of weddings and wedding plannings in my days that I would be of service to her during some of my time off during the week. Wheee... this could be fun. (I just have to remember not to impliment too many of my own ideas and not be able to use them when I get married someday).

dear sally

When Harry Met Sally

It's been a while since I have watched that movie and admittedly I don't remember the lines used in it, but I think I have some of the concepts down. The most basic is: That a guy and girl cannot 'just' be friends. With atleast one or the other there is most likely the attraction of a possibility with the other at some point in the future. There is nothing wrong with this. It is simply a proven fact of human nature and sexuality. With this case in point one of the inevitable is to happen...

1. After whatever period of time is needed, the other recepicates the feelings of the other and they two live happily ever after (to whatever extent that is supposed to mean).
2. The one expresses interest and the feeling is not recepicated by the other and hence the two are both devastated (one over the loss of a hope, and the other over the loss of a 'friend').

Whatever the outcome the initial stages are infested with the self lie that one is 'just' a friend. Well, maybe they are just that in your eyes.. . . But they may not think that regarding you. Either way, it is hard to believe that one would be so naive to the other's feelings towards them. While one doesn't like to go around thinking that everyone of the opposite sex that acknowledges them has the intention of being with them (*and I am even referring to the most noble of intentions), we all must at some point come to realize that this is just how human nature works. Why are people friends in the first place? Maybe they have no intention of having a romantic interest in the person, but guaranteed, given enough time with that person, people get comfortable with one another and eventually can fall for or be fallen for. This happens time and time again. Case after case. It sucks when option #2 occurs, and a great loss is taken. But when option #1 turns out everyone is happy, and nothing seems wrong with the way they went about getting to know one another as friends-first. So what is the alternative? Is there even one? I don't know. Some might say to not enter into a friendship where you spend time (on the phone, in person or whatever) with someone of the opposite sex unless you feel like it is the right timing for such a relationship to possibly develop. Does this mean to treat every person/situation as a prospect whether initial apparent or not? I don't know. All I know is that I have guys that I consider friends. And I don't want to just stop talking to them because they are just that, my friends. If I loose them, I loose a friend. Why do I have friends that are guys? Well, I've always felt that I could relate better to guys. I had two brothers growing up so I was surrounded by people of the opposite sex. I suppose they also make me feel better about myself than girls do (something about a spoken or unspoken rivalry between women). I haven't fully sat down and thought about it. However showers of questions sprung from an instance today when I stepped back and took a look at my friendships with guys under the light of the Harry/Sally philosophy:

Why do I still have guy friends? Hmm... I'd like to think that it is because they are my friend that I don't want to loose them, but I never stopped to consider if it could be because they may turn out to be a romantic possibility for my future, and that letting go would mean lessening my chances at such a relationship with someone that I already know and care about firstly as a friend.

Hmmm. That was an interesting thought... and whether it was a thought borne of my mind or planted by some other source, I know not. I mean, it's not necessarily a wrong thought in essence, but if that is what actually directs my path, does that mean that ultimately I am leading each one on... Or does that mean that they have to have had a romantic interested that I personally am aware of for that to be labeled as 'leading them on'? Is it possible to maintain a purely 'just' friends relationship without self-deception regarding feelings for or feelings detected from that 'friend'? Oh so many questions. So many thoughts on the horizon. And I have a small feeling that I may not be making any sense. Argh. Oh well. It's just a blog entry.

how to charm me - vol. 1

Fall in love with Jesus. He is the most attractive One.

life

Life. You cannot explain it, you can only experience it.


How to charm me: fall in love with Jesus. He's so attractive.

run

I'll sing it one last time for you
Then we really have to go
You've been the only thing that's right
In all I've done

And I can barely look at you
But every single time I do
I know we'll make it anywhere
Away from here

Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear

Louder, louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say

"Uhm, excuse me,... you have something on your... uh, oops, nevermind... I am sure you are already aware of that. How silly of me."

As I was getting off the bus this morning I walked passed a girl who appeared to have some dirt on her forehead. Being the nice person that I am I quickly pause and nudge her and begin to tell her that she has something on her forehead when it *dawns* on me that it's Ash Wednesday and that she is probably quite aware that she has ash on her forehead. Duh, Emily. Get with the program! Actually I would have never known that it was Ash Weds. had it not been for the Classical Station on my car radio pointing it out to me this morning on the way to campus. (And yes, if you did not catch it I said, my car. Hurray! I am now a happy owner of a '91 Toyota Corolla. Thank You, Lord.) In between saying that all those celebrating Marti Gras should now officially stop but not to worry because it is also the beginning of the Chinese New Year I heard that it was also Ash Weds. So appearantly there is always a reason to party on this planet. Something to feed the hunger for entertainment that is welling up in every man's soul. Leave it to human invention to devise some other form than God to fulfill that need. Somehow I think man wasn't alone in his invention.

i have a new addiction

Speed Scrabble. I just can't stop playing. Everytime I play whether I win or not I must play again and again and again repeatedly. And I am serious. It's insane, but fun. I have to get a scrabble set of my own. I must. I simply must. Hmm. . . I am starting to feel a wee bit pathetic here. Nerdy and pathetic. But just for clarification, I am not pitying myself.

moving on to my second box of kleenex

Contrary to the title of this blog, I am not blogging on zero sleep tonight. I woke this morning still feeling as sick and tired as a dog (where o where did that expression even come from?!) but I got up reluctantly and got myself ready to be picked up by my carpool this morning. After a laborous two hour prayer session for those under our care and numerous tissues full of (yes, I am going to say that word again!). . . snot, I still felt like crud. Having no appointments of my own on Thursdays I offered to join my g-p for hers but was quickly asked, "Is there any way to stop that incessent nose blowing that you have been doing the past week or so?" Geeze! If I knew the answer to that I would have fixed my faucet-of-a-nose much sooner than now. To which I quickly opted to go home and sleep the rest of the day away. So now at 10:31-ish at night I have been laying in bed for nearly nine hours today trying to get better. Having slept probably five hours today I am quite sure that falling asleep tonight will be more than a task. Thank you, Sean for offering your evening to entertain my still-sick-but-rested being. Now if I could only get my hands on a TV or some other form of entertainment to buy you some time to do your homework (you BETTER be doing your homework!! *wink*). Maybe I'll just start blogging about anything and everything. Might as well, since JM has my TV at his place and it's not looking like I will be able to get it anytime soon.