coffee drinkers
YOU KNOW YOURE DRINKING TOO MUCH COFFEE WHEN.....
* You answer the door before people knock.
* Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.
* You ski uphill.
* You grind your coffee beans in your mouth.
* You haven't blinked since the last lunar eclipse.
* You lick your coffeepot clean.
* You're the employee of the month at the local coffeehouse and you don't even work there.
* Your eyes stay open when you sneeze.
* You chew on other people's fingernails.
* Your T-shirt says, "Decaffeinated coffee is the devil's blend."
* You can type sixty words per minute ... with your feet.
* You can jump-start your car without cables.
* Cocaine is a downer.
* All your kids are named "Joe".
* You don't need a hammer to pound nails.
* Your only source of nutrition comes from "Sweet & Low."
* You don't sweat, you percolate.
* You buy 1/2 & 1/2 by the barrel.
* You've worn out the handle on your favorite mug.
* You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee.
* You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it's not plugged in.
* You forget to unwrap candy bars before eating them.
* Charles Manson thinks you need to calm down.
* You've built a miniature city out of little plastic stirrers.
* People get dizzy just watching you.
* You've worn the finish off your coffee table.
* The Taster's Choice couple wants to adopt you.
* Starbucks owns the mortgage on your house.
* Your taste buds are so numb you could drink your lava lamp.
* Instant coffee takes too long.
* When someone says. "How are you?", you say, "Good to the last drop."
* You want to be cremated just so you can spend the rest of eternity in a coffee can.
* Your birthday is a national holiday in Brazil.
* You're offended when people use the word "brew" to mean beer.
* You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug.
* You can thread a sewing machine, while it's running.
* You can outlast the Energizer bunny.
* You short out motion detectors.
* You don't even wait for the water to boil anymore.
* Your nervous twitch registers on the Richter scale.
* You think being called a "drip" is a compliment.
* You don't tan, you roast.
* You can't even remember your second cup.
* You help your dog chase its tail.
* You answer the door before people knock.
* Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.
* You ski uphill.
* You grind your coffee beans in your mouth.
* You haven't blinked since the last lunar eclipse.
* You lick your coffeepot clean.
* You're the employee of the month at the local coffeehouse and you don't even work there.
* Your eyes stay open when you sneeze.
* You chew on other people's fingernails.
* Your T-shirt says, "Decaffeinated coffee is the devil's blend."
* You can type sixty words per minute ... with your feet.
* You can jump-start your car without cables.
* Cocaine is a downer.
* All your kids are named "Joe".
* You don't need a hammer to pound nails.
* Your only source of nutrition comes from "Sweet & Low."
* You don't sweat, you percolate.
* You buy 1/2 & 1/2 by the barrel.
* You've worn out the handle on your favorite mug.
* You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee.
* You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it's not plugged in.
* You forget to unwrap candy bars before eating them.
* Charles Manson thinks you need to calm down.
* You've built a miniature city out of little plastic stirrers.
* People get dizzy just watching you.
* You've worn the finish off your coffee table.
* The Taster's Choice couple wants to adopt you.
* Starbucks owns the mortgage on your house.
* Your taste buds are so numb you could drink your lava lamp.
* Instant coffee takes too long.
* When someone says. "How are you?", you say, "Good to the last drop."
* You want to be cremated just so you can spend the rest of eternity in a coffee can.
* Your birthday is a national holiday in Brazil.
* You're offended when people use the word "brew" to mean beer.
* You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug.
* You can thread a sewing machine, while it's running.
* You can outlast the Energizer bunny.
* You short out motion detectors.
* You don't even wait for the water to boil anymore.
* Your nervous twitch registers on the Richter scale.
* You think being called a "drip" is a compliment.
* You don't tan, you roast.
* You can't even remember your second cup.
* You help your dog chase its tail.
posted by mlejane at 5:32 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home