just tell him...

ok, at the request of a fellow blogger... here it is... i wrote this poem in college... it's over 4 years old now... it's about the agony of words not spoken and in this case, written regarding love... the pains one passes through in desiring to say what cannot be said or written... because as life is uncertain, so are feelings at times, and that makes them hard to express. it's not a big masterpiece, but i'm pretty happy with it.


the letter of a captive thought to my hand

this all could be said
only my tongue is laced.
just tell him.
words like caged animals
hungrily pace the floor of my mind.
my emotions become infuriated with each step
and burn away at the patience in my being
leaving my face
to it's own twisted fate
revealing the barred mass of confusion
i love him, i think i love him.
just say it.
just tell him.
in the silence my thoughts whisper
then grow bold
until they scream inside me
oh, but I CAN'T. I CAN'T.
piercing shrieks of a restrained heart.
their voices are dulled by
a will without a way
it can wait
it sure could wait
after all, he has no idea.
once again the shrills have waned
due to his ignorant involvement
may they die there --
set my being at peace
put out the fire in my soul
but they do not die --
they will not die
their embers faintly glow.
i love him.
he needs to know.
hell, i need to know,
how my palms hold the fear of response
so incapable of the pen --
surely if my lips do not sound
cannot my hands the pen employ?
do the job, o hand.
you must. you simply must
tell him.
just tell him. tell him.

i love you.